Loss
Miscarriage. What kind of name is that for such an event?
Mis – Ill, mistaken, wrong. Carriage – A manner of holding the body or head. Posture. Act of Transporting. A baby carriage. A wheeled support. A miscarriage of justice. To miscarry. To not handle well.
Oh, you dropped it. Butterfingers. Can’t you carry it?
Can you carry a tune?
It’s not something horse-drawn.
The carriage came off, it mis-carriaged.
I am a glutton for self-punishment. I keep imagining a little boy toddling around our dining room table. He points at things. He laughs. He eats and cries. He disappears.
What was lost? I think of the little person I will never know. I think of the young person I will never meet. It is easy to dismiss a miscarriage. It is not easy to dismiss the family member that just melted, came apart, and floated away.